A new and different look at the subject of “depression”

Depression is not from sadness, it is from family anger; But it is anger directed at you; When you are angry with yourself for a long time, this Old anger makes you hostile to yourself, you become your own enemy, you become your own biggest enemy, and you know what we do with the enemy?
We fight with him, we humiliate him, we trivialize his work, we annoy him, we blame him, we make fun of him; We don’t like him, we hate him and…

Yes! Depression is the anger that you have had on yourself and you have not stopped fighting with yourself; You remain grumpy and depressed.

Instead of fighting, make peace with yourself, instead of being your enemy, be your friend; What do you expect from your best friend? Do the same for yourself to become your own best friend…

Forgive yourself in the first step;
You will not get peace until you get over your mistakes and mistakes…
To achieve this goal, you must also forgive others…

Old anger becomes an enemy over time, an enemy or hostility means enmity; This means that if you are angry with someone for a long time, you have become enmity with him…whether it is you; what else…

Text: Abbas Nazeri
With a little purification and additions

Why do romantic relationships fail?

The following article is republished with the permission of the respected master Sarkar Mrs. Dr. Bombay Chi.

Hello dear ones

Sometimes we hear from people around us that people who happen to be very romantically interested in me break up and whether they are partners or other spouses, they are interested in me.

They don’t continue living together, we are shocked that where did all that love go? once upon a time

It may happen to us, but not always to the neighbor!

In the next post and in continuation and completion of her talks, I will briefly present the results of my studies to you dear ones.

Emotional, love and work connections are formed in every possible way.

But the challenge ahead is their long-term stability and durability.
Although there are many factors for the long-term stability of emotional, emotional and work relationships; But all these factors can be expressed in a general framework:

“mutual need”

There are four rules in this regard:
▪️ Needs are a combination of material and spiritual issues.
The length of the relationship has a direct relationship with the amount of mutual need; In other words, the greater the mutual need, the longer the relationship will last.
The duration of the relationship has a direct relationship with the duration of mutual need; In other words, as long as there is mutual need, the relationship is stable.
The more intimate the relationship is, the more the satisfaction of mutual needs is, and as a result of the frustration of satisfying mutual needs, violence and coldness of relationships are formed.

Based on “mutual need”, both partners (emotional, business, etc.) will continue on their path and will accept all adversities, hardships, differences in tastes, bitterness, etc.
But when one of the parties can meet his needs from another place or in another way, or feels unnecessary; This relationship gradually or suddenly becomes cold and silent.

In other words; The presence or absence of each party in the relationship must be tangible and tangible; That is, if you were not present for a day, the void in your existence should be felt and so should the other person…
that’s mean:
“Being and not being in any relationship should make a significant difference to the other person.”

Now put all the recommendations that are given to have a stable relationship in this framework.

Therefore, as long as the parties need each other, they will automatically observe all these points:
– Have mercy.
– Make time for each other.
– Do not compete with each other.
And….

In the end, I remind you that long-term relationships are not strengthened by clichéd words and advice; Rather, they need strategic and executive instructions.

How to reach the desired result in existing disagreements?

According to Mr. William Glasser’s theory, “need” and “behavior” are on the two ends of the scale; Whenever behavior and desire (need) are aligned and reinforcing, the bottom of the scale will be equal; Therefore, it is necessary to adopt a behavior that brings you closer to your desire and goal; Not the other way around.
For example, if you want the study environment to be calm, you should adopt a behavior that will lead you to your desire. In this case, fighting and aggression creates a negative atmosphere that makes it harder to achieve the goal.

Need → goal → behavior